Monday, August 18, 2008

Writer's Block: The Far (Out) Side

Living alone can do things to a person's mind. What once upon a time never used to bother you, suddenly becomes like a big deal - suddenly you see the world with myopic eyes.

There are a lot of perks that come along with living alone. There's no one to share anything with, no one to nag you about your turn to do the dishes, and no complaints from anyone when you get too lazy to cook or do laundry.

It's perfectly ok to walk around in your undies or belt out a not-so-perfect tune. But it also means having to change the light bulb by yourself, accidentally hammering your thumb instead of the nail, and carrying a six-step-ladder all by your lonesome because it costs $20 and three days to have it delivered to your apartment at the next block.

You spend Christmas and New Year waiting for someone - anyone, to call, and buy yourself a bottle of vino to help knock you out.

It also means having to spend your birthday like Jesus, because everyone was out waiting for Santa. And you thank your stars that at least your mother remembered, because the other one person you were counting on to remember, coincidentally dropped off the planet and returned with amnesia.

So you thank God that at least you have a job as Dilbert. At least you still got a roof over your head. But then, your landlord calls saying he's raising the rent, which means you have to look for a more affordable roof, and get some order back in the chaos of your life that you haphazardly dumped in boxes.

Then as you unload it all, you realize - Dammit! I need new glasses. -wmf